Texts Gallery

naturist nature multicamarid susan seidelman peggycarters miss gertrude
textsfromcastlevania:(423): Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
(774): It’s official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this worl
(904): It’s a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determinatio
(412): Here’s the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lu
(207): DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
(225): I am drunk shake weighting right now.
(317): It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
textsfromwalpurgisnight: (214): MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME. (214): SHE’S GOING TO SMOKE
(440): Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
(250): His parents know me as “the white shoed screamer”
(505): I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten ye
(724): Would you be mad if I just used the argument “I’m allowed to say tha
(603): YOU CAN’T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
(860): im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
(847): Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn’t feel this ok after last nite.
(916): The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I’m gonna bag me a rhino.
(916): You said you’re gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
(503): You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he
(970): I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throa
(214): Ok. Here’s the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your ne
(334): She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She’s a keeper(205): R
(717): You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
(561): My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
(202): I always “accidentally” drop a condom and make sure she sees it&
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