mistersbeard: Paramount to any successful ddlg relationship is the use of safety along with respect,
mistersbeard: Paramount to any successful ddlg relationship is the use of safety along with respect, trust, and communication. And perhaps one of the most important elements to put into place during play is the use of your safe word In simple terms, this is your escape word. This is the word that you use when things become too much and they need to stop immediately to take a break, to end the play or as we sometimes call it the scene, or to simply make your daddy cease doing whatever it is that he is trying to do. Safe word for littles: Let me make this very clear to you… This word is yours and cannot be taken away or revoked for any reason whatsoever. This is your word to get out of a situation that you don’t want to be in. Now, that doesn’t mean that you should just go using it whenever you don’t want to do something… Because it’s good for you to push your limits and your boundaries. What I’m talking about is when it gets to be overwhelming and too much to the point of trauma, pain, or something that’s going to damage you in some way physically, emotionally, or mentally. And if you are in a relationship where you are not allowed to use it then you need to get out and run away as fast as possible from the person that you are with. Because this is abuse. You are being abused if you follow the rule that you are not allowed to use your safe word. And you should never ever ever ever ever allow it to be taken from you for any reason including punishment. Taking your safe word away for a punishment is abuse. Taking it away for the pleasure of your daddy is abuse. Taking it away for the furthering of whatever he thinks he’s doing that is good for you… Is abuse. and please… Please please please… Don’t think you are going to impress him by taking more than you can handle and not using your safe word. You are just going to damage yourself. daddies listen up Do you love your little? Do you want her to stay around? Do you want to cherish her and respect her and treat her like the princess she is? Then establish and use the safe word…. And if you’re not using it, stop everything you’re doing and implement it NOW. What kind of safe word should I use? I recommend that your safe word be at least two syllables, preferably 3. Short one syllable words are too close to words like no or stop, and can be misinterpreted, misheard, or not easily decipherable when in the heat of play or an impact situation. Common words I’ve used in the past are: Colorado, banana, San Francisco… I also recommend that if possible you make it something that you hate or a place that you dread being the most in the world. This will trigger ill feelings and break the mood. After you have established an agreed upon the word you should both practice saying it out loud. Say it at normal tones and at louder tones and let your daddy get used to hearing you say it out loud. Practice makes perfect… And will make your experience better in the future. non verbal safe words There may come times during play where the use of your verbal language is not possible. You can use your imagination as to what the situation may be… But that does not mean that you cannot have a non-verbal safe word and it is something that I highly recommend you establish. In movies and other things you will see the use of blinking as a form of communication. I do not recommend that you use this method simply for the fact that impact and trauma play can induce you to squint or blink profusely and could confuse your daddy and ruin your good time. Rather I prefer the squeeze method. If you are in a situation where you are pleasing daddy and he is becoming rough simply holding him by the wrist and squeezing as hard as you can can signal that you are in trouble and need him to stop. Keep your hand around his wrist at all times during play when you are not able to speak and do not let go for any reason. Practice this method ahead of time squeezing as hard as you can so that he recognizes the sensation if it needs to come and be used. You may even find this practice to be somewhat surprisingly intimate. Likewise discussing and agreeing upon a place on his body where you can touch him and perhaps dig your nails into him or cause him some type of discomfort or pain is a good idea. Use a physical trigger in order to communicate your need for what is happening to stop. Again, practice your agreed upon method ahead of time so that he gets used to feeling it and knowing that that is the signal to stop what he is doing immediately. alternatively the use of red light green light is a possibility… Which simply you have a large card that has green on one side and red on the other. When you are in play and everything is good the green side should be flipped up. When things get too bad and they need to stop, you flip over to the red side to signal that you need things to end. This card should be kept in a highly visible spot that is also easily accessible and within reach. However this method can be at fault sometimes because if the play is very physical your little may not be able to have full function of her hands or appendages in order to signal. This is where your skills of concentration come into play, and you must be continuously reading her visual cues and “listening” to her body to determine how she is enjoying your time together… triggers can occur… And she may become non verbal, but also non-physical. Meaning that she might just simply lock up and stop responding in any kind of way whatsoever. You must concentrate on her and how she is reacting at all times… because there may come a point where you have to use your own discretion if she is not responding properly. Daddies: THE USE OF A SAFE WORD IS NON NEGOTIABLE. Her submission to you is a gift. It is not your right, it is not your privilege, it is not yours to destroy. Do not be a selfish jerk and ruin her good time by revoking her of her rights and treating her like garbage. She is allowed to use it whenever she feels that it is needed. And she will use it in order to save the both of you some problems in the future. Respect yourself by respecting her. and as for the long distance relationship, this all applies as well… Whatever you are doing on skype or whatever you try to make her do on kik… Or any other platform in which you communicate, if she uses her safe word you had best respect it. don’t abuse the glorious gift that she has given you. As always my inbox, ask, and fan mail are open. If you have an idea for a post or a question, feel free to contact me. - Mister Find more educational content, bedtime stories and my writings here: https://mistersbeard.tumblr.com/post/156731271523/going-through-messages-i-noticed-that-a-lot-of-the Mistersbeard - A DD/lg blog - mistersbeard.tumblr.compaypal: mistersbeard@gmail.comyoutube.com/mistersbeard -- source link
Tumblr Blog : mistersbeard.tumblr.com