finitefall:I can’t believe I’ve read this. No, that’s not exactly true: I can beli
finitefall:I can’t believe I’ve read this. No, that’s not exactly true: I can believe it, because I’ve already read some awful things about rape victims in the past. I just can’t believe it exists. I wish no one would ever think about saying things like that. Good victim versus bad victim again… Do people understand how awful this is for rape victims to say there’s a way to be a good victim, to remain “the virtuous maiden”? No, it’s not blaming Dany, right, it’s just saying her attitude on her wedding night when she was first raped is why she got raped again and again because “she doesn’t learn”, while Sansa’s attitude is the key to not getting raped again. It is blaming rape victims, and it’s also total bullshit to say that if you show your fear and disgust the first time, you’re not gonna get raped again. The fact it didn’t happen again is about who Tyrion was, not about how Sansa acted.This isn’t even about Dany and Sansa, this isn’t even about Drogo and Tyrion, this is about the fact that no, this post doesn’t talk about a point that’s “interesting on a literaly level”. This is about sexual abuse in general and how this awfully twisted vision of things is part of rape culture. Even if it’s not their intention, this is sending the dangerous, terrible message to girls who are reading this that if they get raped, they have to “remain the virtuous maiden” through it to make their abuser feel guilty and not be raped again. Because the one who isn’t “the virtuous maiden” is the one who’s gonna have even more awful things happen to her, and it will all be because she didn’t learn from her mistakes and didn’t act “virtuous”.Here’s a fact from real life: no matter how you act and what you say, if you’re raped you’re in danger of getting raped again as well as in danger of being murdered. I’ve known a girl years ago who didn’t fight back and pretended to enjoy it so she could have a chance to escape and not get killed. I was seven years-old the first time I was abused, and I didn’t show disgust or fear. My face was blank, I guess, and for years I pretended that everything was okay. When someone tried to abuse me when I was a teenager, I went willingly into his car because he had a knife and I was scared and alone with no one around to scream for help. I pretended that I was okay with going with him, I even talked to him, I didn’t know what the hell to do because I was scared out of my mind. I got lucky and was able to escape. And considering what I was wearing and the fact I had a boyfriend at the time and was sexually active, no I wasn’t “a virtuous maiden”. I don’t fit into the “good victims” category for those people. But here’s another fact from real life: I’m a survivor and if anything ever happened to you, you’re a survivor too and there’s no way you’re a “good” or a “bad” victim. This doesn’t exist. If you’ve been abused, you’re a victim and there’s nothing you could have done to prevent it. Stop teaching girls and women how to not get raped. Teach people to not rape.Just for the record: I’m not talking about my own life so people can feel sorry for me. I edited my post to add this part even though it wasn’t easy for me to do so because it’s important for people who come across this terrible kind of message to know that the “right” attitude doesn’t exist. This is far too important and we need to spread awareness about it. -- source link
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#rape cw#victim blaming