Look dude, there is nothing I can do about the color or the bottle being half empty. You pay extra f

Look dude, there is nothing I can do about the color or the bottle being half empty. You pay extra for fresh, and that’s what was in the tank. So do you want it or not? Because if you’re not here to do business then I have no reason to be talking with you. So either pull out your phone and pay, or I’m gonna kick your balls for wasting my time, dump this on the ground, and head back inside.Yeah yeah, that’s what I thought. Pull out your fucking phone and pay for the piss. I know, I know: you’re sorry for implying that you didn’t want my delicious, freshly bottled piss. You’re going to give me a 10% tip as an apology, and another 10% because you want me to fart in your face. I don’t actually have to fart, by the way, but you’re still going to tip me because you want me to. That’s it, such a big, fat number typed in and now you just go ahead and hit send.There you go. Pay without complaint. My piss is valuable and fucking rare because the only guy that makes it is me. If I won’t sell it to you, you can’t buy it. Which is why you’re going to bow down, kiss my shoe, and thank me for giving you the opportunity to purchase my piss.You are going to ask me, beg me even, to hand over the precious liquid you just spent a ridiculous amount of money on. Tell me how badly you want it while it is still warm. You better make me believe it too, because if I don’t I’m going inside and filling the other half of this bottle with ice cold water. You don’t want that do you? That would ruin the flavor or something gross like that, wouldn’t it?Yeah, that’s it, get down on your knees and beg. Fuck you’re so pathetic: you actually want my piss. Fine fine, I take pity on you. You can have my golden liquid if you kiss my foot again and thank me. That’s right, appreciate this gift, express your gratitude as you bow to your Prince of Piss. -- source link

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