meteorstricken: Since this was presented as a writing reference, let me add, as a survivor of protra
meteorstricken: Since this was presented as a writing reference, let me add, as a survivor of protracted emotional abuse: A few rare incidents here or there sporadically or under unusual stress does not an emotional abuser or emotionally abusive relationship make, and most of these do rely on a certain kind of condescending motive, tone, and/ or context. For instance, “Hey, there’s no reason to get upset. That shadow’s just from a twisted old tree, not a tentacle monster!” is not an abusive statement in the least. It’s probably someone calming down a kid with a hyperactive imagination. Perfectly benign. (I mean, it could be a tentacle monster, but normally?) It’s all about the pattern and underlying intentions. It’s all about the long-term effect of backing the victim into a mental corner and breaking down their self-esteem to the point where everything they say, do, and think feels wrong without the abuser’s validation. And probably even with it, because the threat of having that validation withdrawn usually hangs over the victim’s head like a Sword of Damocles. -- source link
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