subzoneconfessions: Sub Personality Characteristics View of others Submissive individuals see other
subzoneconfessions:Sub Personality CharacteristicsView of othersSubmissive individuals see other people as much more capable to shoulder life’s responsibilities, to navigate a complex world, and to deal with the competitions of life. Other people appear powerful, competent, and capable of providing a sense of security and support to the sub. Dependent individuals avoid situations that require them to accept responsibility for themselves; they look to others to take the lead and provide continuous support.Submissive judgment of others is distorted by their inclination to see others as they wish they were, rather than as they are.These individuals are fixated in the past. They maintain youthful impressions; they retain unsophisticated ideas and childlike views of the people toward whom they remain totally submissive. Subs tend to view the Doms like strong caretakers, in particular, in an idealised manner; they believe they will be all right as long as the strong figure upon whom they depend is accessible.Self-imageSubs tend to see themselves as inadequate and/or helpless; they now they are in a cold and dangerous world and are unable to cope on their own. They define themselves as inept and abdicate self-responsibility; they turn their fate over to others. These individuals will decline to be ambitious and believe that they lack abilities, virtues and attractiveness.The solution to being helpless in a frightening world is to find capable people who will be nurturing and supportive toward the sub. Within dominant protective relationships, the sub will be self-effacing, obsequious, agreeable, docile, and ingratiating. They will deny their individuality and subordinate their desires the Dom. They internalize the beliefs and values of the Dom. They imagine themselves to be one with or a part of something more powerful and they imagine themselves to be supporting others. By seeing themselves as protected by the power of the Dom, they do not have to feel the anxiety attached to their own helplessness and impotence.RelationshipsSubs tend to see relationships with the Dom as necessary for survival, on a inconscient level. They do not define themselves as able to function independently; they have to be in supportive relationships to be able to manage their lives. In order to establish and maintain these life-sustaining relationships, subs will avoid even covert expressions of anger. They will be more than meek and docile; they will be admiring, loving, and willing to give their all. They will be loyal, unquestioning, and affectionate. They will be tender and considerate toward those upon whom they depend.Dependent individuals play the inferior role to the superior Dom other very well; because of this they are very attractive to dominant people that tend to see them like the ideal erotic partner. With these methods, subs are often able to get along with very aggressive, unpredictable or isolated Doms. To further make this possible, subs will approach both their own and others’ failures and shortcomings with a saccharine attitude and indulgent tolerance. They will engage in a mawkish minimization. They will deny their individuality, their differences, and ask for little other than acceptance and support. They became therapeutic to Dominants.Not only will subs subordinate their needs to those of others, they will meet unreasonable demands and love to submit to erotic aggressiveness and intimidation to avoid ideas of isolation and abandonment. They will volunteer for unpleasant tasks if that will bring them the care and support they need. They will make extraordinary self-sacrifices to maintain this important bonds.It is characterized by at least 3 of the following: 1. encouraging or allowing others to make most of one’s important life decisions; 2. subordination of one’s own needs to those of others on whom one is dependent, and undue compliance with their wishes; 3. unwillingness to make even reasonable demands on the people one depends on; 4. feeling uncomfortable or helpless when alone, because of exaggerated fears of inability to care for oneself; 5. preoccupation with fears of being abandoned by a person with whom one has a close relationship, and of being left to care for oneself; 6. limited capacity to make everyday decisions without an excessive amount of advice and reassurance from others.Associated features may include perceiving oneself as helpless, incompetent, and lacking stamina.Millon’s subtypesPsychologist Theodore Millon identified five adult subtypes of submissive personality. Any submissive individual may exhibit one or all of the following:SubtypeDescriptionPersonality TraitsDisquietedRestlessly perturbed; disconcerted and fretful; feels dread and foreboding; apprehensively vulnerable to abandonment; lonely unless near supportive figures.SelflessMerges with and immersed into another; is engulfed, enshrouded, absorbed, incorporated, willingly giving up own identity; becomes one with or an extension of another.ImmatureUnsophisticated, half-grown, unversed, childlike; undeveloped, inexperienced, gullible, and unformed; incapable of assuming adult responsibilities.AccommodatingGracious, neighborly, eager, benevolent, compliant, obliging, agreeable; denies disturbing feelings; adopts submissive and inferior role well.IneffectualUnproductive, gainless, incompetent, useless, meritless; seeks untroubled life; refuses to deal with difficulties; untroubled by shortcomings. -- source link