demons–angel: smartsurrender: *stabbing, knowing, familiar comforting pain*Immediate, knee
demons–angel: smartsurrender: *stabbing, knowing, familiar comforting pain*Immediate, knee-jerk response is to post this while shouting and emphatically pointing, as if it were on fire:“THIS!!! THIS THIS THIS!!!! THIS G*d damn, MOTHER-FUCKING THING RIGHT HERE—This is the most important thing you *must* know about me. Ever.”Not my favorite color or when we met or any “anniversary” or that I despise Lima beans and adore avocado, or if I spit or swallow or if I “belong” to you orwhy the word “relationship” is for pussies orthat I dream of swimming with whales or I want to spend the second half of this life writing books andloving someone by cooking excellent food andmaking a comfortable home for U/us because W/we deserve that, and more.None of that matters…until you understand that I will do almost everything to make you leave, shy of being unfaithful. That is a line I will not cross. Have I crossed it before? Yes. With another who was unkind, cruel and far less worthy of me.I will forget about U/us between visits and pretend we are not “that serious” and push hard against intimate thoughts and flip the bird to my true feelings about you, about us…not forever. Just until I don’t have to.And the risk is that you might not survive my tests. Buckle up or choose another ride. Your choice.-SmartSurrender i second your thoughts, am the same way … very VERY well said !!! I love you for saying that, demons-angel.Remember when I told you there was something I would learn from you, or that you would learn from me? Perhaps this is part of it. I am so glad you commented. -- source link