humansofnewyork:“When the kids were young I was living in the moment. I was just trying to get them
humansofnewyork:“When the kids were young I was living in the moment. I was just trying to get them through the day: homework projects, sleepovers, keeping the food coming. Taking this one to a band concert. That one to a track meet. There were plenty of worries, but they always seemed manageable. I could usually intervene if one of the kids had a problem. And I thought: ‘Once they’re out of high school, I’m done. I’ll finally be able to relax.’ But all my children are adults now, and I’m worrying more than ever. Because their problems didn’t stop. They just became adult problems. And there’s not much I can do anymore. One of my sons has depression. I began to notice during our Sunday night phone calls, his voice was flat, the answers were short. Then I asked the right questions and it all came out. He said: ‘I’m depressed. And I don’t know why. And I don’t know how to fix it.’ One night he just wept on the phone, quiet weeping, which is the worst. Because there’s nothing to address. Just lots of dead space, and: ‘Are you still there?’ There wasn’t much I could say to cheer him up. Mothers tend to lose their credibility after a lifetime of praise. So I’m just left to worry if it will ever resolve. I worry if he’ll ever be happy. I urged him to see a professional, but there’s not much else I can do but pray. I’m not sure if prayer helps, but I get on my knees and do it anyway.” -- source link