pennndragon:#this sounds rly lovely and all and maybe it’s true to an extent #but i’m like #he has k

pennndragon:#this sounds rly lovely and all and maybe it’s true to an extent #but i’m like #he has killed so many people over the course of the series and for a lot of them #i don’t think he lost any sleep over them. #he considered them necessary #but honestly there were probably other solutions? and if he was really against killing i think he would have tried harder to figure them out #he acts rashly and without thought a lot of the time and usually that ends in him killing someone #see i think there’s a very solid line in his mind #and if you cross that line–if you hurt or want to hurt the people he cares about #he will not hesitate to kill you.And this is what makes his character so intriguing and complex, in my opinion. He’s a cinnamon roll but he’s also a problematic fave. On the surface level, Merlin is just a skinny weakling, a coward in many people’s eyes because they don’t know what lies underneath. His persona revolves around this, he never truly lets people see the real him, except for a select few when necessary. Merlin is definitely the hero of this story, but in a way, he’s also the anti-hero. He never asked for Arthur to be his destiny, but he takes it on regardless, albeit a little reluctantly at first. In this way, he’s selfless, but the fact that he throws away all of his morals just to succeed in protecting those he loves (mostly Arthur) also makes him, in a way, very selfish. There’s so much duality in his character and it especially shows in the later seasons. Killing Agravaine in the caves by throwing his head against a rock? Sure. Slaughtering the Dochraid because it attempted to harm him as he left? No problem. Creating a fucking earthquake that probably killed multiple people because Arthur was in danger? Ok. Leaving a man to be crushed in a falling tower because he messed with the last dragon egg? Done and done. Yes, Merlin is compassionate, intelligent, kind, empathetic, sympathetic, caring, and sometimes even merciful if he feels like it. But you know what else he is? Ruthless. Absolutely and utterly ruthless.  And this trait shows itself front and centre when someone fucks with him or someone he loves.And this is also, in a way, why Arthur could not have found out about Merlin before he did. In the early seasons, Arthur couldn’t have handled it, and Merlin would have been exiled, minimum. But in the later seasons? Merlin’s gone too far, and he’s already slipping down the slope. Because Arthur would never have been able to condone saving himself above all things (Because his life’s worthless? No, because it’s worth less than yours), and Merlin at that point could not accept anything less. It’s what he and Morgana have in common, in a way - both of them take their sole, terrible hope (Morgana’s “I will destroy everything that hurt me” vs Merlin’s “Arthur will save us all”) and go so far that they do not dare look back. A Merlin outed to Arthur in the later seasons would either become a wreck, broken by his own decisions with Arthur’s moral code overruling them, or he would become a villain - probably by taking control of Camelot because he knows best damnit now he can make the world better. The tragedy of Merlin is that Arthur grows as a character, becomes nobler, becomes more generous, more understanding, less of a bully - and as he does, Merlin becomes less forgiving, more ruthless, and far quicker to judge. We all talk like “if only Arthur had seen the real Merlin”, but what Arthur had seen the real, ruthless and dangerous Emrys? Could the two of them ever have reconciled that?Maybe there was a golden point in the middle where it just could have worked, but the point is that they missed each other. Arthur could only find out about Merlin that late because he was dying - there’s no time for Merlin to tell him any details, or for the two of them to decide a future for Camelot, there’s only enough time for them to acknowledge their friendship before Arthur is gone. Problematic Fave to Cinnamon Roll, Cinnamon Roll to Problematic Fave. A winning combo sure to break the entire fandom’s hearts.  -- source link

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