bmgmw: bmgmw: “True Forgiveness” & Maya HartThis writers tweet has me optimistic about the outco
bmgmw: bmgmw: “True Forgiveness” & Maya HartThis writers tweet has me optimistic about the outcome of GM Forgivness. A lot of the replies to their tweet were people saying things “Wait Maya’s actually going to forgive her father????” I can see how, at first glance, it seems like they are going in that direction.But the line “No, truly forgive them” gives me a different perspective. In Boy Meets World, Topanga forgives her father (for leaving her mother) and he walks her down the aisle at her wedding, etc. Clearly, they repair their relationship. Yes, that is one type of forgiveness. To say, “Yes, you did something wrong. But I forgive you for doing that thing. Let’s move on and continue on with our relationship”. It’s the kind of forgiveness that’s easier to do when the wrongdoings in question are not serious (i.e. according to spoilers, Zay and Lucas forgive Farkle for spoiling the movies) or if the wrongdoing isn’t directed directly at you (such as in Topanga’s case). But their is another type of forgiveness, and I think it is much more powerful. As someone who has worked with people with mental illness, domestic violence, and other issues, I’ve seen this type of forgiveness occur firsthand. I’m just going to drop a quote here that I think sums up this idea of “truly forgiving”:“Inner peace can be reached only when we practice forgiveness. Forgiveness is letting go of the past, and is therefore the means for correcting our misperceptions.”The second type of forgiveness is not about saying what the other person did was okay. It’s not about the other person. It’s a necessary selfishness that arises from a place of great pain that the other person caused. This kind of forgiveness is saying, “What you did was wrong. And I spent so much time and energy being hurt and upset and letting you this have power over me. Now I’m forgiving you (but not forgetting) in order to let go and move on”.And I really hope that this is what Maya will do. In no way does she need to forgive Kermit in the conventional sense and then try to have some relationship with him. Regardless of whether he is portrayed as an asshole or as a young father who got scared and left but now is an okay grown up guy who wants to fix things, the hurt that he has caused her is tremendous. Not only did he hurt her, his leaving has pretty much colored her perception of everything (abandonment issues, hope is for suckers, i come from a family of quitter, “he (Lucas) needs someone like me to bring him down”, etc etc). It’s crazy to think about but her whole world is tainted by this idea that she hoped her father would come back (he didn’t), and instead he went off and started a new family (leaving Maya to believe she’s not good/or worth it). “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you”.Maya needs to forgive, yes, but her forgiveness will be less about Kermit, and more about freeing herself and letting go of the past and past misperceptions. And if GMW goes this route and address this type of forgiveness, I think it could be a pretty powerful episode. Throwback to my most spot on GMW prediction -- source link