Maybe it also stretches beyond our own microcosms of abuse. I have started to see how the patterns e
Maybe it also stretches beyond our own microcosms of abuse. I have started to see how the patterns extend to a societal level. . . Why would a man that I have never had any interest in dating and who I have no rapport with what so ever comment on my Facebook single status with some celebratory excitement? . . Why do predators troll the #singlemom hashtag? . . Why do men assume we are single and available until they find out we aren’t? . . Maybe a part of the fear of announcing being single is due to the predatory nature of the dating world. . . Abusers would love for us to keep our stories ‘private.’ . . PRIVATE is such a hilarious word when used as a weapon by an abuser. They use ‘private’ when they mean SECRET because they don’t want to ruin their reputation. They don’t want others to know what they’re capable of. They want to try to avoid the shame and humiliation that they dole out so readily. . . Family is ‘private.’ Relationship problems are ‘private.’ The nature of breakups is ‘private.’ The list goes on. . . When we stray beyond these invisible lines, it sometimes feels as though we are being punished. The stories make people feel uncomfortable. People don’t want to ‘choose sides.’ People don’t want to hear about heart break, misery, or trauma. . . This rejection of the truth can be triggering to survivors who know all of the million and one ways we can be silenced… everything ranging from a subtle shift in body language to physical harm. We are hyper-vigilantly aware of rejection. . . We compensate by becoming as cool (read: numb) as a fucking cucumber. No one wants to be the “crazy lady” and no one wants to appear unstable or unhinged. We break up and then immediately armour ourselves with “I’m fine” because escaping abuse needs to be palatable for those who have to put up with us on the day to day. . . Fuck That. . . Tell Your Story. Take Back Your Life. https://www.instagram.com/p/BzHaneTArLv/?igshid=1ddwyafgtgfor -- source link
#singlemom