Story time. There was a guy who was the ex of one of my current boyfriend’s friends. IE: I basically
Story time. There was a guy who was the ex of one of my current boyfriend’s friends. IE: I basically had the smallest interaction window with him. And I wish I had more. Because this man was magical. Imagine a gangly middle schooler who never quite grew up, but was now in his early 20s, had a pube stache hardcore bad, and the kind of rat like facial features that made him seem painfully straight, even thought he was bi. What I knew of him before I met him was that he once joined a DnD campaign as, and I cannot stress that this is 100% true, a dildosmith. He smithed dildos and used them in game as weapons. How does this relate to Sonic you may ask? Well, let me say it like this, everything I just said is literally all the non Sonic related things about this man. Because this guy didn’t own any article of clothing that wasn’t Sonic related. I met him all of three times. Each time he wore the same Sonic baseball hat, that included a bill with the bicycle seat nose Sonic has on the end of it and the front face was Sonic’s eyes and included Sonic’s ears, as well as a Sonic Hoodie, that was just Sonic’s face repeated as a pattern over and over, and a Sonic wallet chain that was made out of rings and had Sonic’s face in faux gold. His pants each time were Sonic related. His shirts were all Sonic shirts. He had two different Sonic watches. But the kicker was he had one pair of Chuck Taylors with Sonic’s face as a pattern and one pair of actual Sonic shoes from Sonic Adventure 2. No fucking joke. His car was also a blue Volkswagen Beetle. It had a Sonic figurine glued to the hood and a plate that said “Go Fast” on it. Everything in my body said to me “Gotta Go Fast away from him” and yet I was entranced by his presence. This human being existed as a human in this realm and somehow had a group of friends who appreciated him. And I’ll never understand any of it. -- source link