firstnorthernlights: theangrytherapist: Can you listen actively? Can you communicate? Can you hear w
firstnorthernlights: theangrytherapist: Can you listen actively? Can you communicate? Can you hear what’s underneath her words? Can you understand before trying to be understood? Can you express your feelings? Can you listen to hers without trying to fix or defend? Can you allow her to be her, have her own friends, likes, and journey? Can you not be jealous? Can you practice empathy, compassion, and vulnerability? Can you work on feeling secure with yourself? Can you say no sometimes? Can you fight fair? Can you admit when you’re wrong? Can you talk about what you like in the bedroom? Can you pick a place to eat? Can you make decisions? Can you believe in yourself? Can you not judge her sexual history? Can you drive with caution? Can you be slow to anger? Can you not react? Can you not assassinate her character? Can you be thoughtful? Can you not always make it about you? Can you be kind? Can you believe in something greater? Can you build something? Can you have your own life? Can you compliment her, because you notice not because you feel like you have to. Can you lead? Can you respect her? . . I think this is one of the greatest differences between a boy and a man. Men have the ability to make someone feel safe. Boys do not. I did not have this ability until well after my divorce, many expired relationships, therapy school, a gazillion self help books, helping others with their relationships, walking on fire, and turning 40. . . Make a woman feel safe and she’ll give you everything. …make her feel safe. it is work, but it is a worthy pursuit. there are so few safe places for her. give her that gift, even were she not to give you anything. in fact, you should expect nothing in return whatsoever for giving her safety is reward in its own right… ♡♡ -- source link