“Well Mr. Jones, as your Secretary of Release, I must say, after going through your file, I just don
“Well Mr. Jones, as your Secretary of Release, I must say, after going through your file, I just don’t see any reason to grant your request for early ‘parole’. I know a 5-year chastity sentence is quite harsh, but I see here you were found guilty on 1 count of masturbation without approval from the Office of Phallic Affairs. That’s a class D felony. You should consider yourself lucky. That could’ve easily been twice as long had the judge decided to max out your sentence instead of maxing out the fine of $250,000. I also see that this is your second time filing for parole, as it says here you have a denied appeal from a year ago. In that case I take it you understand how this works? If your request for parole is denied, the sentence length re-starts the day following your denial. I recommend you wait out your 5 years in full this time, Mr. Jones. A third denial automatically bumps you up to a class C sentence. You’re dismissed.” -- source link