twisted-misogynist-2: inferior-cunt: owlmansdead:Because I can. Because it’s so easy. Because once
twisted-misogynist-2: inferior-cunt: owlmansdead: Because I can. Because it’s so easy. Because once I do, you’ll never be able to get over me. Because he knows he can treat me like shit over and over and I’ll keep crawling back for more. Going weeks, maybe months with no contact. I’ll tell myself it’s done, I’m going to tell him that he can’t do this anymore, I’m happy without him now. Ignoring the little voices in my head that say, “you won’t, you’ll jump at the chance to talk to him again, to be his broken toy”. “I’ll just see what he wants, maybe he’s sorry, he obviously misses me, why else would he message”. Vain attempts to convince myself this isn’t as pathetic as it seems. My friends just don’t understand, they don’t see what he’s like sometimes, they don’t know. I know, I know he really wants me, he has to, doesn’t he know what a mess I’ve been without him. He’s destroyed me, I need him, it’s better to have him like this than not at all, right? And he knows the turmoil and struggle he causes each and every time. It amuses him to watch me sink lower and lower. His messages go from things like “Sorry, I’ve been busy but I have some time this week” to “Miss me? Come over tonight, I’ll make you useful for a while”. Sure, the first few times I fight back a little, try to retain some bit of self-respect. He taunts me “So you’re going to turn down this chance with me tonight, despite the fact that it’s all you’ve thought about for the last few months? Your choice, there’s another girl I can contact, I just thought you might like the chance”. There never is another girl though. Of course, he could easily have one, but he doesn’t need to, he knows I’ll crawl to him, each and every time, no matter what. The more he ignores me, the more desperate I become. He’ll spend weeks with me and then break contact. Leaving me to pick up the pieces, put myself back together again. It takes so long to rebuild myself and when I finally feel like I’m getting there again, like I’ve regained control, he comes back. His timing is perfection, he knows. It’s all one big game to him, ripping my life apart, taking parts of me with him every time. Creating this shell of a person. And I allow him to, other girls wouldn’t. I don’t put a stop to it, I crawl back. He doesn’t force me to, he takes what I willingly give. It’s my fault. This is what I am, what I’m good for, his broken toy. Always available to him despite everything. Broken, pathetic, weak. This is what I deserve. I need a cunt like this -- source link