day 437 : 24/7 frozen toes have quite the way of putting a damper on my spirits. . or maybe that’s t

day 437 : 24/7 frozen toes have quite the way of putting a damper on my spirits. . or maybe that’s the plethora of other issues plaguing my body currently. . one week post-surgery today. been mainly using the wheelchair to get around because i’m limping a bit and trying to give the knee a rest while not developing bad walking habits. . the soreness of suddenly starting pushing a wheelchair around a hilly and obstacle-ridden town is no joke. also loading the chair in and out of the car (you can just imagine onlookers’ faces, but i came across the hashtag #AmbulatoryWheelchairUsersExist yesterday so that’s neat). i typically stand and load it in the back, but because my legs aren’t very strong, i can’t squat and lift correctly, so my form suffers and it’s probably not the smartest move (shout-out to bestie for calling me out ). my muscles hate me. . started full-time at work today. been ramping up my hours the past 6 weeks, but i still felt like it has been hella fast and all of the things that were helping me through my day the past few months i no longer have the time or energy for. . which leads me to the hard lesson i’m coming to learn about how healing is not linear. i’ve become so disheartened at realizing that i’m in another depressive bout. it so totally and completely sucks to not feel good, to feel numb, to not want to do anything including drinking and eating. . i know this is not forever, so i just plan on riding it out, gracefully or not. not judging and being kind to yourself is really hard b-t-dubs. . there’s so much more in my head, but i’ll save that for another day. if you’ve read this far, please know i am thankful for you and that i’m ok, just going through a low spot. thanks for being here, friend. . oh, and have I mentioned that i’m tired of paralysis and it’s domino effects? . . . #rebuild #spinalcordinjury #scirecovery #learningtowalkagain #notimeforparalysis #whatparalysis #notalldisabilitiesarevisible #paraplegiclife #incompleteparaplegic #thecomebackisstrongerthanthesetback #brokenbody #bionicbadass #lifeaftersci #nothingisofflimits #exerciseismedicine #moveyourbody #takecareofyourbodyandyourbodywilltakecareofyou #liveyourbestlife https://www.instagram.com/p/BnpZGm4hGJv/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=dxqt5sbg5w0r -- source link

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