“Is that really the first thing you want to say to me?” He shrugged, “I guess so huh? Well, th

“Is that really the first thing you want to say to me?” He shrugged, “I guess so huh? Well, that’s minus one point for you, and you are off to a terrible start.” He tapped his shoe and looked expectantly at me, “You’re really clueless, huh? Well that costs you another point, plus another because I’m offering to explain what you’re supposed to do if you immediately bark like a dog.”It took my brain a beat to realize what he wanted from me, but I hesitantly started barking. He nodded so I barked even more. I wagged my ass, stuck my tongue out and panted, then barked again.He nodded again and worked to suppress a smirk, “That’s it bitch, very funny: plus one point. You see, that’s what you’re trying to do here, you’re trying to please me and guys like me. When we are amused you get a point. When we are not amused, you lose a point. You win the level if, at the end of the hour, you have positive points.“Sounds easy, right?” He shook his head, “Wrong bitch. You see, we get to keep 90% of the coin you spend every time you start or restart this level. Not to mention that your points are cumulative from guy to guy. That means when I leave and you have negative points, you will start with negative points if you choose to try again with the next guy. We have every motivation to keep you here as long as possible, which is why this level is nicknamed ‘go for broke’.“Plus, the guys they select to do this are notoriously self-satisfied. We’re all things like jocks, hipsters, even some geniuses. What could a bitch like you ever do that would add to the seriously satisfying lives we live? I mean, just look at me. I’ve had farts that are more amusing than you."Let that be a goal for you: to bring me, and guys like me, at least as much pleasure as one of our own farts. Every time you make us feel as good as ripping ass does, you’ll get a point. Oh..and uh…minus one point…because here’s a tip: you can beg us to stay for another round. If you get a guy you think you’re connecting with, and you’re gaining points, beg his generous ass to stay.“Now,” He sighed, “I’m going to subtract a point because explaining that was seriously not fun for me. Plus another point because even after listening to all that you haven’t even tried to amuse me yet. That means we’re like…a minute in and you’ve already lost 5 points. Fun fact: if you end the round down five points or more I get to kick you in the balls, plus some extra kicks awarded for every three points you drop below that.“And since kicking you in the balls is actually very fun, I’m going to need some pretty good reasons to raise your score at this point. What’s so messed up is that you haven’t even tried to please me yet. Well, I guess that’s minus another point for you and another step closer to a second kick for me…” -- source link

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