goodomensblog: rynewind:I can’t have you risking your life. Not even for something dangerous.
goodomensblog: rynewind:I can’t have you risking your life. Not even for something dangerous. Okay, but the symbolism here???I mean, we’ve got a couple of layers:(1) On one level, Aziraphale handing Crowley his little matching tartan thermos of holy water is visually representative of Aziraphale, finally finally giving a little bit of himself over to Crowley.He’s spent literal centuries putting up walls. Looking at Crowley adoringly only to hide it - wiping the smile from his face (sometimes even physically turning away) - the second Crowley has any chance noticing.(2) The second layer of symbolism is a HUGE part of the reason why Aziraphale has been putting up walls. It’s undeniable that Aziraphale is conflicted about his role as an angel and feels guilt regarding the warm feelings he harbors toward a demon - who is supposed to be his sworn enemy. BUT the tartan thermos highlights the other major reason why Aziraphale has tried to keep both emotional and physical distance between them:Aziraphale believes himself to be a danger to Crowley. He sees their arrangement as risky for himself, but for Crowley? Aziraphale believes that by associating with an angel, Crowley is risking his very existence. Aziraphale says it repeatedly: they would destroy you. Aziraphale sees himself (his association with Crowley - his love for him) to be as dangerous as holy water for the demon.WHICH IS WHAT MAKES THIS SCENE SO DEVASTATINGAziraphale knows that he is dangerous for Crowley. So is Holy Water. But when Aziraphale hears that Crowley is going to be immediately, presently risking his life to obtain Holy Water, Aziraphale steps in. He can’t have him risking his life. The car scene - complete with soft music, long looks, and you go too fast for me - is devastating because Aziraphale has saved Crowley in the short term, but you can see it on his face - Aziraphale knows he has shown his hand. He loves Crowley, of course he loves Crowley. And with Heaven and Hell looking over both of their shoulders, Aziraphale’s love is more dangerous than the Holy Water he’s just passed across the car.And when Aziraphale says: Perhaps one day we could go for a picnic; maybe dine at the Ritz, it’s a heartbreaking confession. Yes, Aziraphale wants this too. Of course he does. But not yet. Not when the stakes are this high; not when the price of losing could be Crowley’s life. -- source link
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