“They opened her up and found nothing but cancer. But even then she didn’t give up. She promised tha
“They opened her up and found nothing but cancer. But even then she didn’t give up. She promised that she wasn’t done fighting. But it became a different kind of fight. It wasn’t easy. She was hooked up to a feeding tube. But she walked so beautifully toward death. She kept a photo album next to her bed. But instead of photos, she kept notecards with Bible verses. She said that her entire life she had thought she loved Jesus. But that now she really loved Jesus. I never once saw her depressed. There were sad moments, but even those were peaceful. And sometimes she’d laugh so hard it would physically hurt. Every day she told me I was beautiful. She’d said it before, but not like this. It was so intentional. And then there were the videos. She recorded videos for the big moments in our lives: graduation, our 21st birthday, our wedding, our first child. Over the years those videos became so precious to me. They’re not very long, just a few minutes each. She opens each one with a greeting. She’ll congratulate me on the stage of life I just hit. And say how sad she is to not be there. Then she’ll give me some advice. It’s very personalized. She’ll say: ‘I know you struggle with X, Y, and Z, so always remember this.’ Ever since I got married two years ago, I’ve known there was one video left. And it’s always given me comfort, knowing it was there. So it was bittersweet when my daughter was born on June 27th. My husband and I watched the final video together. It was harder than I expected. She was sicker than the other videos. She spoke really slowly. She talked about how I’d always loved babies, even as a child. And she said that she wished she could be there to cuddle my baby. She talked about my childhood, where I struggled, and where I excelled. And she ended by saying: ‘Love and encourage your babies. They will grow up quickly. So hug them. And pray for them.’ And that was it. She told me that she loved me and said goodbye. For years I’d been dreading that moment. But it felt strangely peaceful. Like I was ready. Ready to take up this role. It’s my turn to have a daughter now. To love her. And to be purposeful with her, just like my mom was purposeful with me.” -- source link