avagrace-orwhatever: It’s after midnight, so I can officially make this post.One year ago to
avagrace-orwhatever: It’s after midnight, so I can officially make this post. One year ago today I took my first dose of HRT. The picture on the left is the last picture I took of myself beforehand, and the right is from today. A year ago today I was excited, nervous, and absolutely terrified. One of the most common things I hear is, “you seem so much happier now!” Before I started HRT, one of the most common questions I got was, “will this make you happier?” I didn’t want to answer that question then, and I still feel weird answering that question now. I don’t want to say that I’m happier, despite my good days far outnumbering my bad for the first time in I don’t remember how long (at least a decade, if I’m being honest). I think saying that I’m happier implies that I’m not battling depression or anxiety anymore, and that’s simply not true. Those very real mental health struggles don’t just disappear when someone embraces their true gender. I don’t know that I’m happier, but what I do know is that I am better. I still have bad days, but the lows don’t feel nearly as low. I don’t have so much pressure pushing down on me anymore. The constant nagging in the back of my mind has disappeared. I feel much more capable of handling the bad days because I don’t have the weight of not understanding myself getting in the way anymore. I don’t know if I’m happier, but I do know that I’m better, and I couldn’t have gotten to this place without access to medical care, an incredible therapist, and supportive friends. xoxo -- source link