froggiej:thegoodvybe:simplypurkey:jazzumon:destielkills:auntiesnixshipper:awkwardteenage
froggiej: thegoodvybe: simplypurkey: jazzumon: destielkills: auntiesnixshipper: awkwardteenagenerves: discard-and-discover: evolve-within: disregardwomen: When my mom’s out in public, she sends me pictures of lesbians she sees. Jesus I envy that relationship. this is like the time when my mum took me bra shopping and the girl measuring me up was a lesbian and my mum said to me “i’ll go take a walk around the shop so you can talk to this nice young girl” and gave me a look as if to say “chat her up”. My mum tries to push me towards cute possibly gay girls and then disappears. She did it in Primark once and I found her hiding behind a pile of knickers, watching me. i love all of your moms When I was 17 I was convinced I was in love with the check out girl at the grocery store 5 minutes away from our house, so my dad went to get milk and somehow found an appropriate point in the conversation while buying a half gallon of milk to give her my number. Three days later she called me and asked if I wanted to come over “to watch a movie” and long story short my dad got me laid thanks dad. That last story is worth reblogging all stories in here are worth reblogging. these are all amazing *applause for good parents* when my wife proposed, I called my dad and he congratulated us and then asked me to give her the phone. He said something, she laughed hysterically and hung up. He said “Now, I don’t know how all this works and all, but don’t go getting each other pregnant too soon.” smh I LOVE MY DAD <3 -- source link