I imagine by now that you are all painfully aware that I, Spooky Mardi Gras, have been tasked with d

I imagine by now that you are all painfully aware that I, Spooky Mardi Gras, have been tasked with delivering unto thee the brand-spanking-new, top-of-the-line, OFFICIAL zodiac signs for 2022.Yesterday and the day before yesterday, we covered January 21st [winter’s bottom rib] through to September 22nd [fun and laughter Thursday] and we were all very impressed with my drawings and excited to hear TRUE FACTS about what was to befall us over the next twelve months.That is, most of us were.And so, without further ado - to you and you and you - let’s bloody well get on with the final four advancements in astrological soothsayery!WHATEVER YOU HAD IN YOUR POCKETS ON OCT 3RD, 2002 [you babies born within that brief stretch of perfect hiking weather] are in for a very interesting year, what with all the traveling and high kicks and bed-hopping. But don’t forget your past! Nostalgia can be a useful tool if wielded correctly. You can learn a lot from your mistakes [apparently].Next up, A GHOST BEING SICK [All Hallows Eve to Tree Down From Attic]. Pretty obvious what this sign means. In fact, you’d have to be some sort of thundering moron to need me to explain it to you.THE WORD “WOLF” [oh, god, it’s winter] is “back in fashion” - which is to say that it makes its 30th appearance in the acrid skies above our auras this solar cycle. Those under this sign are either a) trying their very best, b) silly gooses or c) refusing to allow their working-class mates to come over to their fancy middle-class houses [even I don’t know what that means]. You should text that guy/gal you like - they might just reply with a secret code.And, speaking of secrets, we round off this “witchy year” with a trip and a stumble into the new “actual year” and A SECRET HANDSHAKE. Oooooh! What could that mean? Shady under the table dealings? Clandestine meetings? Old friends returning from overseas? An agreement to never again mention that young lady that Dave “accidentally” murdered and threw down a well?Probably not.And that’s it!You can stop reading this now. -- source link

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