theshitpostcalligrapher:abraxis-and-anceline:theshitpostcalligrapher:dragonslover1:theshitpostcallig
theshitpostcalligrapher:abraxis-and-anceline:theshitpostcalligrapher:dragonslover1:theshitpostcalligrapher:shittyreblogger:theshitpostcalligrapher:req’d by @feralbookwormwell it all started when i moved to british columbia….Wait, why did you steal a tractor?why do four year olds do anything at all everWait you stole a tractor when you were four?? in my defense i dont think the neighbours thought i could pick it up so fast off observation alone bc i couldnt speak english at the time AND that people dont lock up their tractors out in the sticksMia. I need the whole story in details like now. its honestly not that long or interesting, thought i will try to make it at least entertaining. when i first immigrated to canada i lived in BC for a while. Mom and I lived in a trailer for like 8ish months while my dad and sister went on to ontario to deal with property shit.I did senior kindergarten in Agassiz, and our closest neighbors were grampa john and gramma jeannie, 2 empty nesters who had a small farm, ran a falconer rescue for peregrine falcons, and were delighted to have a new pseudo-grandkid to teach things. Even things you really shouldn’t teach a 4 year old with no understanding of morality yet. A lack of basic moral values made worse because she thought she was dead (tl;dr rural BC definitely fuckin looks like heaven to a child born into polluted apocalypse of mid nineties urban China so i thought i’d died on the plane over) and therefore had no consequences to deal with. As such, after a while of getting toted around on grampa John’s lap on the tractor, I noticed thata) driving the thing took like, 4 actions to remember, even if i didnt understand his english as he explained them andb) that day, he’d left the keys in it. And I dont remember this next part, but my parents swear it happened because APPARENTLY i fuckin took that John Deere on a goddamn joyride, causing a variety of property damage. -- source link
#amusing things#theshitpostcalligrapher#tractors#story