lost-in-ikea:glam00ur:all 46 excuses on my friends wall, 1. i was just really, really early for tomo
lost-in-ikea:glam00ur:all 46 excuses on my friends wall, 1. i was just really, really early for tomorrow2. we can’t all be usain bolt3. in this day and age, we shouldn’t need labels like “late”4. i had pe first period do you blame me5. i really, really didn’t want to sing6. my brother thought it would be hilarious to drop me outside the prison gates7. you can’t tell me how to live my life8. #YOLO9. my legs fell off and i had to roll all the way to the emergency clinic10. there was a freak yachting accident11. i am a fucking retard12. this is just for my wall13. do you even read these14. “it does not matter how slow you go, so long as you do not stop”15. i spent my entire night writing tom daley fanfiction16. my father left my mother for an air hostess seven years ago do you expect me to get over that emotional trauma overnight17. sarah palin and i got into a twitter war and i couldn’t leave and let her win18. traffic jammy jammy jam19. how can i go to school when alex turner20. my sim was having an emotional meltdown and i needed to be there for her21. i was sticking it to the man22. i spent my entire night worrying if i would ever lose my virginity 23. fifty shades of late; i was walking and then i caught the eye of an attractive member of the opposite sex and we began exchanging significant looks and i knew we would one day make sweet love so i just walked alongside him and tried to catch his eye and to be continued24. part two he was playing hard to get so we walked and walked and he had the perfect hair colour it was sort of beige brown anyway it turned out he was walking to a bus stop so obviously i had to catch the bus because true love and silently we rode out to papakura and into the sunset25. my meth lab caught fire26. my bed is more comfortable than your school will ever be27. i was sad28. it was a nice day, so i walked leisurely29. i had beat my younger brother for saying “swag”30. i had to travel back to the 1950’s to ensure my birth31. 2 kool 4 scool32. i had to stop, collaborate and listen33. i tried34. i’m sorry i’m late it’s not my fault my auntie was killed and i joined a cult35. a haiku about lateness:late late late late latelate late late late late late late late late late late late36. my best friend was telling me how to give a satisfactory blow job i wish i was joking37. i was fashionably late38. i was caught in a flash mob true story omfg39. i did not choose the late life, the late life chose me40. do41. you42. even43. read44. these45. i was fighting al qaeda46. trafficYESSSS IT’S ON MY DASHBOARD AGAINthe post that doesn’t age -- source link