nothing-but-white-noise:jimmyjuniors:Alone on Thanksgiving? Mad at your dad? Want to skip that long,
nothing-but-white-noise:jimmyjuniors:Alone on Thanksgiving? Mad at your dad? Want to skip that long, insulting conversation about how you’re still single? About how your parents really want more grandchildren? Well, look no further!I am a 28 year old felon with no high school degree, an eight-foot-tall Wookiee best friend, and a dirty old YT-1300 light freighter, the Millennium Falcon, painted like Eddie Van Halen’s guitar. I can play anywhere between the ages of 20 and 29 depending on if I shave. I’m a smuggler and I’m constantly being accosted by bounty hunters.If you’d like to have me as your strictly platonic date for Thanksgiving, but have me pretend to be in a very long or serious relationship with you, to torment your family, I’m game.I can do these things, at your request:openly hit on other guests while you act like you don’t noticestart discussions about politics and/or religionpropose to you in front of everyonepretend to be really drunk as the evening goes onstart an actual, physical fight with a family member, either inside or on the front lawn for all the neighbors to seeI require no pay but the free meal I will receive as a guest! -- source link
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#ha!#excellent#han solo#starwars#fic prompt