alliradaye:A few weeks ago, I asked him to please reinstate some of my rules. It was my fault many
alliradaye: A few weeks ago, I asked him to please reinstate some of my rules. It was my fault many of them had fallen by the wayside, during those periods when I balked and recklessly disobeyed them. And I had long felt too ashamed and contrite to ask for rules I had purposefully abandoned. So when I timidly asked him for more rules very recently, I felt relieved and delighted when he agreed. The first rule he reinstated was that I resume my deep throat training. This was the rule I felt worst about abandoning - because wasn’t it enough that I was a stupid, disobedient cunt, no, I had chosen to not do something that was to improve my usefulness to him. Sigh. Stupid. The rule is that I push myself until I feel myself gagging or until I succeed, so this is a difficult task every day. I like to bring a dildo into the shower with me and practice in there. I can choke and gag and drool and throw up and still keep going when I’m in the shower. The water makes my eyes sting and the the gagging makes me lightheaded and it still hurts quite a lot to forcibly stretch my throat around the dildo. I’ve been repenting by throwing myself back into the task with infinitely more abandon than I had let slip in neglecting it. But I’m improving! He told me. He even misspelled words to tell me so. “Wooowww,” he said. “Impressive,” he said, and I was so pleased that he was pleased that I could’ve tipped over the edge into an orgasm by focusing on his praise alone. So I had to stop thinking about it then, but still, I felt grateful and content. I want to deserve all my rules back again. -- source link