worldofcreation:So. I travelled to Portland recently and had the chance to shoot with @yourtoxicad
worldofcreation: So. I travelled to Portland recently and had the chance to shoot with @yourtoxicaddiction and chavezwho . I didn’t have much to shoot with, because I had travelled there to photograph models and wasn’t expecting to model myself. Silly me! Haha. See, the night before, we all went out to the strip club (as is tradition in Portland) and as we were getting ready, I was putting on my knee braces. And my hip brace. Fun fact: it’s hard to accept where my body is, and where it used to be, and where it is going. Having Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome means that things change rapidly- sometimes that’s positive and sometimes it means adding a new brace or surgery to the list. It’s been very difficult for me to feel confident and sexy when every outfit is accompanied by a medical device. Everyone has their insecurities, and this is mine. Side note: Don’t judge just because you may not relate, and please don’t point out that I have so many other things to be thankful for. I am aware of my privilege in life- you are only aware of what I choose to show you. I voiced these insecurities to my friends, and Toxic looked at me and said, “Braces are sexy. I love a woman in braces. You are beautiful!”. And that was it. That was what I needed to hear. The next day, when it was suggested I shoot with my braces on, I was a bit hesitant…but it had been on my mind for quite some time and I felt like it was a necessary step in making myself feel more self confident, and empowered, in something that I have no power over. I was afraid that, upon posting this on Tumblr, I would receive backlash and accusations of sexualizing and fetishizing disability, because I am a nude model and these are intimate and nude photos. But here’s the thing: I am the one in these photos. I am the one giving the consent for these photos to be taken, for my own personal EMPOWERMENT. I am a sexy woman, on my OWN terms, and yes- I am disabled. There is a huge social stigma surrounding disability and sexuality. It has to stop. I am delicate, I am fragile, and yes- things need to be handled differently when it comes to my love life- but that does not mean that I, or anyone else on the spectrum of disability, should feel less deserving of sexual attention or expression. So there. Take that tumblr. Disability is sexy. Thank you so much to Ben for taking these amazing photos, and for Toxic and Ben for encouraging me to emBRACE myself. Upon looking at these photos, I cried. Like, a lot. These braces help me to achieve things that I otherwise would not be able to. They help me build strength, endurance- When I put them on in the morning, I no longer feel like I am fragile, I feel like I am strong, sexy, and every bit as amazing on the outside as I feel on the inside. -- source link
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