Nonbinary Folks Are Still Invisible, Even in Queer SpacesGender-bending-and-breaking icon Prince&rsq

Nonbinary Folks Are Still Invisible, Even in Queer SpacesGender-bending-and-breaking icon Prince’s song “I Would Die 4 U,” opens with the line: I’m not a woman / I’m not a man / I am something that you’ll never understand. Any Prince fan knows that he’s talking about God, but to those outside of the gender binary and the expressions that are attached to it, it’s gospel. Prince accurately speaks to the lives of so many of us who aren’t understood, or who don’t fit in with the rest of the puzzle that is gender expression in the queer community. His lyrics call attention to a concept that, to this day, is impossible in many folks’ imaginings of gender — that it is not a binary or spectrum, but a universe of identities and expressions.You can be masc; a boy/boi, stud, butch, bro, bruh, dad/daddy, masc4masc. You can be femme; feminine, a queen, a fem, a girl/gurl, lipstick, a princess, motha. The space between the two is like being in the middle of the dance floor while everyone stands on the sidelines. It’s like being the middle child who was too often overlooked by their parents. It’s being greeted with, “so, like, what are you?” It’s the silence from your own community because they don’t know what to do with you or how to see you. It’s often being too queer for queer people to conceptualize. It’s a losing game.Those of us who don’t perform gender correctly — whether cis or trans — are often told to pick a side, or become tossed to the side entirely. We’re generally invisible to the wider community. People look at us and don’t know how to include us, love us, hear us, fuck us, or value us, because they’ve been taught to instill value and worth in the polar ends of the binary and the safety of rigid gender roles. Anyone living in-between or outside of the binary is disqualified or forgotten.So much attention is given to how well one can perform these static roles. Do you have the lipstick? Do you have the swagger? Where’s your outfit? Watch your mannerisms! Queer spaces often devolve into pageant contests, and so many of us don’t even qualify to compete. What would the queer community look like if we allowed ourselves to just be? To just exist?As a male-assigned agender person with no attachment to any gender identity or expression, I’ve always found it difficult to navigate queer spaces because I’ve never fit in with community constructs of gender expression. Even as a drag performer, an art form built upon subverting gender and gendered expectations, I can never escape this ominous binary. When queer people convene, we try to connect with others who express who they are in similar fashions, because finding friends and accomplices in this strange and exhausting world is vital to our survival. However, I can’t help but imagine what is going through the minds of folks who see me and try to decipher where on the gender expression spectrum I fall.Continue reading: Freddelanka  -- source link

More pics about