shakespeareansapphic: demisexualmeansnormal: Ace Tumblr: We NEVER pressure people into identifying a
shakespeareansapphic: demisexualmeansnormal: Ace Tumblr: We NEVER pressure people into identifying as Asexual!! Also Ace Tumblr: [this shit] parody text by Toria, via Facebook Okay, to be clear, I totally believe in asexuality and that there are real asexual people who legitimately have never and will never experience sexual attraction, and that is 100% valid. But a couple of these are the reasons why I identified as asexual a number of years ago. I had never experienced sexual attraction because I was trying to force myself to be straight and was also just not sexually mature yet, and I clung to the label and kept it. I mean, like, I figured it out when I saw a woman I was undeniably attracted to, but I felt a lot of shame for then discovering sexual attraction in myself afterwards. This isn’t to say that people coming out as ace is a bad thing. It’s certainly helpful for real asexuals and it is a stepping stone for many of us into the world of non-straightness, but maybe this comic brings up some valid points about shoving labels at people before they’re really ready. I can see what you’re saying about it being a “stepping-stone” of sorts for coming out as similar-gender-attracted (SGA), but at the same time, I remember being a teenager in the mid-90s, when a lot of gay and lesbian people first identified as “bisexual,” as teenagers, before coming out as gay or lesbian.On one hand, yes, that’s still a problem, because it can create the false impression of “bisexuality is a phase,” which creates some very understandable resentment from actual people on the bi spectrum, especially as some (arguably too many - but then, I also think that even one is “too many”) gays and lesbians who had that phase of their lives where they thought they might be bisexual come away as biphobic.On the other hand, if one thinks they might be bisexual as a similar “stepping-stone” identity before realising that they’re gay or lesbian, they’re still, on some fundamental level, embracing that they’re SGA, whereas having a similar phase of life where one may think they’re asexual before coming to terms with being gay or lesbian is based on a fundamental denial of being SGA. Basically, the former feels at least slightly healthier than the latter - thinking one might be bi before realising they’re gay says “I’m open to being attracted to people with a gender similar to, or dissimilar from my own,” while thinking one night be asexual before realising one is a lesbian is like saying “I’m not open to being attracted to anyone.”Yeah, we all find our ways of coping with certain circumstances, but not all coping is equally healthy. -- source link