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Horoscope: Your uniqueness as a human being is threatened when you find a person who enjoys ham just
Horoscope: The stars wouldn’t take the risks you do, but, hey, it’s your life for the next six month
Horoscope: All signs point to shame.Where’s the nun with the bell when you need her.
Horoscope:The stars hate you. Maybe try tarot or taking responsibility for your own life. Or at leas
Horoscope: The little voice inside your head will be powerless to stop the barrage of Q-tips this we
Horoscope: Your eyes go black and birds fall out of the sky as you smile for the first time in centu
Horoscope: Actually, Frankenstein is the doctor. The monster is you. Be fair, the doctor ain’t
Horoscope: No matter how bad things get, or how hopeless life may seem, you can always go home again
Horoscope: The stars wouldn’t take the risks you do, but, hey, it’s your life for the ne
Horoscope: Look at you. Barely a month into the new year and you’re already breaking your reso
Horoscope: Your uniqueness as a human being is threatened when you find a person who enjoys ham just
Horoscope: All signs point to shame.Where’s the nun with the bell when you need her.
Horoscope: Conflicts at work and at home are cleared up instantly this week when you decide that all
Horoscope: The stars want to encourage you in your core beliefs, specifically your saying of: &
Horoscope: You’ll feel like a million bucks this week when security guards escort you acro
Horoscope: Years of enduring the constant, numbing pain of existence will end this week when you dis
Horoscope: The only thing holding you back from your dreams is you, and the threat of imprisonment.&
Horoscope: That high school experiment where you had to take care of an egg for a week like it was y
Horoscope: A passionate and intelligent debate over semantics this week will unfortunately get bogge
Horoscope: Much like the little mermaid, you will sell your soul to a dark power for the chance to b
Horoscope: Give yourself a little credit today. Not everyone could screw up so badly in such a varie
Horoscope: For the last time: Yes, there is a parasitic life form growing in some sort of pod deep i
Horoscope: Exciting changes await you in the coming days as Evolution decides you’ve been gett
Horoscope: You’ve always been a fashion-forward trendsetter, which is why, after next Thursday
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